dont worry your back hair reminds me of angel wings
the point i decided it was time to leave was when i was on the floor of the bar, after taking her down with me, and a table.
I went out in a blaze of glory. I failed the field sobriety test by saying ABCD FUCK YOU.
Got a stripper to howl at my wolf shirt.
bad sex. bad bad bad. it was like trying to pick up an overcooked noodle with an empty pringles can. why do these guys always seem to find me?
Apprently after I bit that bouncer, it all went down hill.
Really? And is this the kinda party we talked about earlier?
Yup. It's just me crying in a closet eating soup
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
Please come home, i don't want to feel like basket garbage girl but I'm in your alleyway and not sure how to change that.
I just replaced the poop spray with an air horn... Now we wait!
You aren't truly friends with someone until you play drinking games via text at 8:30 in the morning.
well. can officially check "get caught having sex on the front porch by the neighbors" off the bucket list.
I made him fuck me while wearing a Thor helmat from Walmart. Geek sex is the best sex
ugh, my whole family is going ape shit over my sister's pregnancy blog. I dont get it? Anyone can get knocked up! I had rebound sex with a new york ranger last night, now that is something to fucking blog about.
Randomize