there is a school bus full of santas parked in front of the liquor store
I like the one of me you and her but you're looking at me...Total foreshadowing right there. I'm cropping it
I was informed last night that im not allowed to pick up the bouncers and carry them around anymore. Last sat is starting to make more sense
Apparently im getting a reputation for how i mix drinks. Im the midas of booze. Everything i touch turns to koolaid.
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
I feel badly that he has cancer, but this does not mean I am obligated to have sex with him. Again.
$150 and 3 orgasms. Dogsitting is awesome.
My cast smells like cheese steak rolls
We almost got stabbed in the nuts last night. Don't worry, we're alright.
as a side note pls kill me
honestly performing my own hysterectomy would hurt less than my cramps right now.
Ok fell asleep on a bus in south Carolina just woke up in Canada where the hell is the liquor store from here?!
It's been three years since Kelly shit in the to go box that we put in Sam's mailbox after we broke up. Considering Sam and I are friends again, should I finally tell him?
Think he has a gf
Yea that shit doesn’t necessarily stop me
Randomize
