This is the first month I have not taken plan B to get my period in over a year
And somehow that makes me sad knowing I haven't had raunchy unprotected sex in a month
Ok forget what i said about christmas break being awful. Chasing shots with fudge
He's so gross, but the preschooler inside me is screaming that this is her life dream and I have to be with him or she'll never forgive me.
she was pretty happy for someone in the middle of a herpes outbreak, how was i supposed to know?
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
I'm at home, drinking with my cat. While this is an enjoyable lifestyle, other plans are preferable.
I just saw a herd of slutty loofahs run down the street...
Also, I saved your name as Everclear last night. No idea why I did that.
Find a vagina and bring it to me. Like feeding a tiger.
I got into a fight with the dude who fell asleep on my couch bc he wouldn't wake up but managed to get a lunch date set for thurs with another guy by the time he finally left. So how's your day so far?
I was trying to remember why my knees hurt then I remembered I was twerking on the countertops.
It's alright. I'm just trying to make her realize you're not good enough for her.
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
He screamed, "Let there be light!" when he came
I feel like a dancer trapped in the body of a math instructor. Love, Mom
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