operation "beaches make me wet" is a go
The police are arresting two women who got in a fight for the last Twilight DVD at Best Buy. Classic.
He just kept telling me how to do certain things. It was like I was fucking my sex ed teacher
The boys in front of me put beer, red plastic cups, ping pong balls, lighterfluid, and twelve packs of pantyhose on the conveyor belt. Whatever drinking game they're playing, I want a part in.
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
We sat in his closet and drank four loko out of my camelbak for an hour in the dark. You tell me how my night went.
I didn't just get this from the chlamydia fairy.. You should probably get tested.
Just made a drunk dude do 20 push-ups. In the parking lot of the bar tonight for a keystone light I found in the back of my truck.
Oh yum
I went limp when I heard her mom fart from her parents bedroom. It lasted longer than my hard on.
Me and my bruised tit have to wake up at 4 AM.
This love triangle bullshit is getting out of hand. It's now a love polygon and I want out
I don't know if the fact that I carry lube in my purse means I'm living life right or I'm doing it wrong..
Sundays were made for eating Ramen pantless in bed.
Seriously my new passion in life is the girth of his penis
I am just High Enough to train A-Team of bodybuilding squirrels MMA techniques to tear you asunder. And it's not that I want to is just don't you make me do it!
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