i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
My doctor literally wrote on the script NO SEX
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE GAY FRIEND?!?!
Anal and Aoki tickets...I'd say I give pretty good Valentines Day gifts.
It took him 5 seconds to cum and then he wanted to hold my hand all night
My inner buddhist recalls, "You receive the d when you aren't looking for it, only when the d wants you." True story.
I fucked a guy that's in Sports illustrated. I'm officially ready for college.
Literally just inhaled three cinnamon rolls. Sara is staring. It was inhuman
Is she okay?
She may want to issue revenge punches, but medically fine.
Did I come home in a police car last night? id come downstairs to ask you but i dont think my legs work anymore
It's been awhile, you pregnant yet?
I found my wallet. Still have no idea when I put mad dog in my steel water bottle, though...
Bro, it was an EPIC night once again last night. I’m so sorry that you saw me naked.
Yeah totally passed out in their trash can last night.
Randomize
