Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
I want Paula Dean to narrate shark week next year
Well, I plan on starting the night dressed as little red riding hood. Then I plan on finishing the night dressed as a shit show in a red cape.
It's all fun and games until some random starts jerking it on the deck.
Making a me burrito to ward off the cold...and the aloneness of my vagina
He made me brush his hair afterwards because it made him feel like a ken Barbie.
God I hope the sex was good.
Shirley Temple died. We owe it to her to get dirty shirley wasted.
Things are coming back to me in chunks. I vaguely remember signing a shirt that said 'I enjoy vagina'
I AM SO PROUD OF YOU
Told him my main goal was to seduce the man and convince him to leave his wife for me. He didn't argue just asked me to let him know if I succeeded so he didn't waste anymore time not sleeping with the secretary at his office. I have an incredible boyfriend.
All you need is a handful of lube and an open mind
I helped you wax your vagina and you won't even get me Corn Nuts you fucking bitch?
that is our friendship pylon, do not lose it
fuck you.
DO NOT LOSE IT
Two of us got arrested. Gonna be delayed a bit. Save me a burger.
Just found a pair of vomit-soaked socks in my purse, three days after the party... Now I know why my wallet was wet.
You were yelling at a tree saying it should be in the forest..
Don't judge me.
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