Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
Can you return condoms to CVS?
Only if you return your pride as well.
It smelt so bad when i tried biting off her underwear that i didn't want to touch with my mouth
After I tried for five minutes to hang my beer from the coat hanger in the bathroom , I have realized I am drunk
Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
he was wearing a tuxedo, i was naked...it's a long story.
Dude, you face planted, there was no "bar fight".
theres still like 7 beers in the gutter from the roof party we had last night. i dont know how we got up there. but we need to get those beers down.
I just took a shot out of my supervisors unzipped jeans. Our staff parties are getting a little too personal
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
Yeah. Not my best idea. But I'm hoping for the best . And by best, I mean not jail
I told my grandmother all I want is a nice guy who likes to be tied up.
Is it festive if I masturbate to Santa porn?
Dude just walked up to me, gave me his number and said, if this number ever calls its my penis,better keep that one handy. I cant lie its the best pick up line ever, im calling his penis.
THERE ARE NO EMOJIS TO SHOW MY SEXUAL FRUSTRATION
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