Flirting with the rich sleazy owner of the club: 1 way ticket to free sushi, drinks, and VIP passes. FUck! im better with older men than i am with babies and dogs
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
it was like he was trying to blow his nose in my vagina
It's refreshing to see you in something that is stained with something other than vomit and spilled alcohol.
Her vagina turned into a vuvuzela. I didn't know it was a possible to have a wet nightmare.
bottle of wine in one hand cigar in the other. 5 am. topless on our fire escape. and she cleaned our bathroom... i like his new girlfriend.
I just used my glow stick from the dance to find my way in the bathroom to puke. Who wants me on their corporate team
Well I consider my vagina a dear friend. She treats me good I treat her good. We work together. Glad we could be of service.
Dude it's bad when your 10 year old son makes fun of your penis size.
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
Yeah, but she is forever sending my vagina on some sort of mission.
I always make inappropriate sexual decisions during the holidays
I give out orgasms like candy and ride a motorcycle...how is that not appealing
As she came, she moaned Roll Tide. I kid you not.
If I'm not there when the plane leaves, I didn't make it through security. See you at home! Vegas bitches!!!
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