Never drink rum straight from the bottle, even if people say it'll make you a pirate. It won't: it'll make you a bumbling shitfaced idiot who just drank rum straight from the bottle.
we're going to dress like we're asking for it, because we are
It ended with me crying and eating pizza in my closet.
I opened a jar of Ragu so I could use it as a cup. You tell me how it's going.
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
Beer pong consisted of me throwing a ball at the wall and then falling over because moving my arm made me dizzy. I think our team lost.
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
Also, beer. Big fan.
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
As pissed as she was, you would've thought I was trying to get back into his pants instead of his booze collection.
Adding to the list of things I have said out loud at the bar that I shouldn't have: "I am the yoda of sucking dick"
Also while I’m drunk I saw your penis in like 4th grade when I walked past the boys bathroom
He goes "what would you say if I told you I like to get it in?" def a potential soulmate right there.
Put viagra in his coffee. I did that with Geoff last month and three hours later I had bitten through a throw pillow and gotten a noise complaint from a neighbor
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