If that ambulance is off to save our dignity, please tell them it's too late...
Dude she has a bf and shes on lockdown more than Nelson Mandela in 95
i totally forgot about the coupon that said i would show him how i pleasure myself.
Do you think this abandoned cigarette has herpes? cuz I'm tempted.
Making and watching you take a mixed shot with vodka, chocolate syrup, tobasco sauce, cranberry juice, and sundried tomato juice wasnt the highlite of my night. Hearing you puking from downstairs was.
I've been meaning to ask you. The first night in the city did we do key bumps with a suicidal homeless man? My memory is fuzzy
Can we get blazed at 9:06 on sunday and reenact the moment of my birth?
I get to be your mom.
She is high at the bar - she thinks the bottle of frangelico is aunt jemima telling her to stop doing drugs.
I am wrecking havoc on the skinny girls by going home with the big one. She is taking me to see her dog now.
I just got head while watching air force one. Harrison ford would be proud.
that man is just a bundle of powerful magic and poor judgment
We fucked so hard that when I orgasmed I tore his towel rack off the wall. He was more impressed than mad.
He fell into the beer pong table and broke it. Then he threatened to throw the toliet at us if we didn't let him keep playing
I just remember yelling "BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS" while I was streaking
No dude shes like 5 feet tall and maybe 100 pounds... Normally i wouldnt be scared but someone gave her a bat. Thats why im in the bathroom
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