is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
I feel like our bond is deeper now that we're both sleeping with married men. now we're really bffls
her underwear stopped being sexy when i saw her pubes sticking out of the top.
Just to be safe, you should be prepared to jump out of a second story window
made the entire pub sing the british national anthem, puked, rallied, then peed in a telephone booth and have pictures to prove it, taking tourism to another level since 2012.
Happy heartbreak day....you got chocolates, I'm eating them/ throwing them out the window at passing couples
Trust me man, I did not put any cookies down your pants when you slept.
Update... last night a man tried to bite my ear. I think he swallowed my pearl earring.
IDK. when she left she was wearing her bra like an eyepatch and offering to shiver the timbers of the dorm patrol.
i took four shots of tequila, threw my fist up in the air, then went around the party showing everyone how to do the ninja turtle handshake. that's the last thing I remember
She just left someone a voicemail saying 'you better not have plans Saturday night, cause I'm going to sit on your face.'
I think I'm going to call this chapter of my life story "Weekday day-drinking in the park isn't just for the homeless!"
Open the door and I will lure them out to freedom with viagra and candy orange slices. You know they love that shit.
I ate her out and told her she tasted like pumpkin pie. She screamed that she hated pumpkins and started to cry
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