i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
Yeah, we spent most of the evening making fun of the drunk girl until we realized it was you.
Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
I'm sorry I kept calling last night when you wouldn't pick up. I'm REALLY sorry I sang "You Oughta Know" on more than 4 voice mails.
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
First booty call in Europe.. In Barcelona. With a German. In broad daylight.... Is that how they do it here?
I need a burrito and a hug.
If I had cancer, and got to make a wish, id make the organization force your dad to fuck me.
they knew we were both to shy to do anything so they got us drunk and locked us in the back yard with a tent. it was fuck or freeze
you have the best friends
Metaphysical thesis on the illusion of self+ 2 day adderal binge = the walls of reality are crumbling
There's a stripper getting there at 10 though so hopefully I'm out before the stripper gets there. I don't have time to deal with a stripper.
He's my favorite late night booty call. He lives next to a Wendy's.
I'm covered in bruises and scratches. I dont know whether to call them battlescars or sex decals
I don't know how I managed to chip the inside of my tooth w/ a turkey and cheeto sandwich, but I think that's what happened.
I'm sorry, a turkey and WHAT sandwich?!?!
Randomize
