This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
Not gonna happen. She just told me she puts glitter over the mole on her nose to make it look like a piercing.
i came on her dog
Its what jesus would do if there were bud light in his time. I feel obligated.
I just found cold cuts in the blender. You and beefeater can no longer have unsupervised parties.
Europeans suck. I just gave him head and somehow i am the one paying for the coffee
I usually would've stopped there but I kinda remember opening the bottle of vodka, and we ALL know that's when things go downhill.
so you told her it was a 'nam scar? i mean, how old does she think you are.
They never prepare you for how broke ur gonna be in college. I just accepted money from two underage girls at a gas station to buy them beer only because I'm trying to figure out a way to run off with it without them noticing.
Dude, use it to buy them beer. Then run the beer to ur car as fast as you can and bring it to the party. Seriously, we're running out of booze over here
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
Time to eat Mexican food til I hate myself.
That's completely alright, I do it a lot.
It's the kind of dick you travel across the country for
I look excited, but its just a facade.
There are footprints all over my windshield
You said you were making waffles...
I think my roomie is silently judging me for spraining my foot by having sex in a bounce house
so the bounce house and tequila was good idea then?
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