Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
got weed?
I'm really tired of you accidentally texting me when your doing illegal things. I'm taking away your phone.
sorry mom...
My kindergarten teacher served me... All coming full circle
I feel like I wont be making enough money to support my frivilous lifestyle of beer and mcdonalds
I have a date tonight... Like a real date... Not the kind where you just go over to his house and have sex and then never speak again.
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
Delete that photo of me. My ass looks WAY to good it in to be on Facebook for everyone to see. You gotta earn that shit.
He just showed up with a bottle of wild turkey a half a can of coke and some marshmallows yelling "gobble gobble bitches" my roommates hate my cousin
Wait, just ask him if can you can join in. You haven't lived until you've taken part in a threesome with your father...or so I've heard
Emoji's do wonders when you actually have nothing at all to say..
Ever since we've gotten back together, it's like the ghosts of booty call's past have been hitting me up. Lol.
It was one of those mornings when I wake up and feel like I have to say sorry to the whole world
if i get arrested im counting on you to get a picture of it
You fucked him, didn’t you?
He showed up at my house with tacos, rum and a negative Covid test. Of course I fucked him. I’m just a simple girl that likes tacos, not Margaret Thatcher!
Randomize
