i never thought i'd have to say "please stop having sex on me"
wow.
yeah, it was that bad.
you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
He started yelling "fuck the environment" then puked all over the baby trees
At the bar dressed as a taco. not a typo. Come down.
Fuck you. You would only tell me how to get to your house in Spanish.
Ate apple sauce off his penis. Nutritious and slutty.
There are at least 3.6 billion human cocks in this world. Get some. Get as many as humanly possible. Literally. Do it. 1-2-3 go!
You know it's time to cut back when your unemployed drug dealer roommate tells you that you party too hard.
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
I saw pigeons eating ur dried up puke today. Last night was fucking great
We tried to hook you up with a girl but you said you'd rather fuck the large muscular black man because "At least he'd be tight". He was the bouncer, he heard you.
literally 50% of my time being 20 has involved my genitals thus far
My gynecologist just said "don't worry, this won't be as hard as…well…" A FUCKING SEX JOKE NO
I love you but I don't want to see you naked.
Be happy for me... Or horny... Or be a really good friend and feel what I want you to feel. Jealousy
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