its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
Oprah is sooooo fat. I can't even concentrate on Mackenzie Phillips talking about banging her dad
I cannot believe you needed a note to remind yourself to ask me about the fourteen sleeping Mexicans.
Worst part of St. Paddy's...me drunkenly crying to a U2 cover band.
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
We are getting high tomorrow and being statues at the cafeteria. Come find us.
do you know how hard it is to walk a mile drunk on 151 it's hard yards are soft and every girl looks good
Just woke up to the best idea ever. Vodka infused BUTTER. Take a second, and think of the possibilities.
My arms are still sore. Apparently, lube wrestling is the best workout ever.
I WOKE UP IN A FUCKING DOG BED HOW DO YOU THINK I FEEL
dude...i punched my best friend in the face, broke up with my girlfriend, and shit my pants.......now i don't know which one to take care of first.
you're the third guy in less than 24 hours she fucked. I'm glad you lost your virginity just don't act like you climbed Mt. Everest.
He interrupted me giving him head to ask if I were hungry, because he wanted to eat pizza. Wtf.
i fucked his best friend. once right next door to him. i'm pretty sure that could be called sweet revenge.
Randomize
