Also, I'm sitting at a crosswalk watching two Mexican gangs fight each other. I miss you too. A lot.
that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
she said she could "feel the heat of my groin" against her. ruined the whole fucking moment.
Can you please check on Jay? He just called and left a Backstreet Boys song on my voicemail. Either it's 1998, or someone needs to go back to rehab.
I truly believe that the solid foundation of any healthy relationship is a drunken one night stand so I can just get all the nasty shit out on the table
1 month til my stepdad becomes a u.s. citizen, so if you want to get in on the divorce pool its your last chance, $5 a square.
I could barely talk to the cabbie and I was text bombing everyone. They need to make an auto timer app to prevent people like me from belligerent late night harrassing. And I was seeing double... Prob would have tried to give your leg a bj and then fallen down the stairs.
Def something wrong w taking plan b with your daughters juice box
Let's just say that the best way to get a girls attention is not to slap her on the ass from the window of a moving cab.
Your text makes more sense read in reverse.
That's the last time I send a mass text invitation to smoke a blunt
As I was about to fuck him, he requested a moment of silence for Leonard Nimoy.
He's nice and all but I think I rather masturbate my way to happiness instead.
How did the surgery go?
My face feels like a marshmallow.
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