Since she's grinding up on your thigh right now, I'm sending you this text hoping it makes your phone vibrate in her vagina
She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
Pillow talk just revealed that he originally thought I was 16.
It's ok I'm watering my plants with a 40 in my camelback, people are staring
It was one of those you-have-no-other-way-home-and-we-already-made-out-so-I-guess-youre-coming-home-with-me-if-you-promise-to-leave-early kind of deals.
I HOPE YOURE READY TO KICK SOME SERIOUS ASS AT TRIVIA NIGHT TOMORROW NIGHT. also, i hope the birth of your niece goes well. BUT MOSTLY TRIVIA NIGHT.
She's just so happy...and so naked.
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
Well I let her practice her tattooing on me. This shaky dragon on my arm says Im getting laid.
Doors open. I'm laying in bed watching caddy shack and drinking a vodka tonic.
And I'm out of vodka so bring vodka or 2013 will blow ass
An hour is enough time for me to get drunk and win a dry hump marathon so I hope you have somewhat similar or better goals
If you sleep with him again I'll have you spayed
I know how to kill a man with nutmeg and a sword. You in?
Or nah
I'm in the Sheetz parking lot waiting for dad to finish a drug deal.
Randomize
