we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
So when exactly did I get naked and makeout with the statue?
Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
you know you made it when your beer pong table is made from imported italian hardwood
It's chlamydia! Thank God!
i was able to set 4 alarms to make sure i woke up in time for class but i couldnt take the open beer out of my pocket before i did cartwheels down the hall...
I always have trouble explaining my life decisions to people over the age of 30.
It's not really the holidays until I raid the medicine cabinet. Happy hydrocodone to me
And a merry methadone to all
Im fairly sure two chicks roofied me last night. Suckers. I love free drugs.
Weird, Jen didn't know mixers were solely for coloring purposes. Don't call me an alcoholic because you're uneducated
He said he didn't want to go down on me so I told him we were going to have an oral stalemate.
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
I feel like we'd have a lot of fun being drunk at a dog show.
I like the new guy, he keeps beer in the fridge.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
Randomize
