I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
Herpes is a lot like Arnold Schwartzenneger. Because it always comes back. Also, because it is usually in some way in control of California.
I guess calling a coworker a lesbian sea cow is some kind of violation.
Those former-lesbian gone white-trash bars always seem to be your favorite.
i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
I forgot how few teeth there are in this state...
The usual. Woke up on a dog bed with peeps and $11.
She started ignoring us once we told her we were out to celebrate your abortion. Who knew strippers could be judgemental?
Dude, I had to stop mid fuck. Her cat was swatting at my balls as I did her from behind. I couldve lost something.
I'm gonna rob all up in that cradle
I don't remember... but I heard a cop threatened to pepper spay my dick
Like I owe him sex. Hell fucking no. I owe myself sex. With a celebrity. Or a clean pornstar. Who knows.
My mother expressed her concerns about my drinking via a facebook message.
If wanting to text you my feelings after three mojitos is wrong I don't wanna be right.
Not only is he funny, he had a REALLY big dick
He's old enough to be your father!
REALLY. BIG. DICK.
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