So, someone in Olympia stole my credit card # last week and bought a platypus vibrator with it. That’s it.
I think im going to throw up on grandma
GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
is it a bad thing if he can only get off when i start talking like one of the girls from Jersey Shore??
sorry we overslept. have a good day at work. p.s. thanks for making it feel like my vagina got hit by a train.
It's sad that the best source of heat that I have is my vaporizer.
BTW, it's bullshit to say that not doing a shot is unpatriotic. You know how I fall for that.
Woke up naked wearing mismatched earrings. Didn't even make it to the bar.
someone just got arrested on campus...
holy fuck look at all that cocaine
You introduced her by saying, "This is the girl who sexes me." Then you passed out on the coffee table.
I was just thinking about if my bath water turned to jello and got a little freaked out
Why do I have this feeling like this is heading in a slightly threesome-y direction
in the future we should consider sippy cups so we can drink and passout accordingly
THE SUN DOESNT SET TIL 647 YAAAAASSSSSSSSSS. Goodbye seasonal depression hello regular depression
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
Randomize
