I was thinking about him in the shower then i get out of the shower and there was a text from him
its like he has a camera inside of my shower that looks into my brain
But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
She laid down on my bed and played "I want you to want me" on my laptop. subtle.
so after six weeks of dating she admitted shes bi and asked if it would freak me out if we brought another girl into the bedroom. i said no in this hesitant voice and she said 'if you let me dont worry ill make it up to you'
i literally fucking hate you so fucking much.
I tried douching with a turkey baster. Not the brightest idea.
he was playing drums on rock band as i poured bailey's into his mouth. tell me that's not a bonding moment.
I am definitely the only sober one on this train. And the only one not wearing a business suit. Wow, Monday Korea.
Is everyone touching their nose at me a sign that I should stop snorting vicodin off my phone in the bathroom at school?
well his attempt to make a white russian with instant coffee, gone off milk, and that weird probably illegal vodka we bought the other day isnt going well
Sorry you had to clean the sheets with your macro notes
You were taking in your sleep. You were like Jess that's that animal we were talking about and you Hugged her feet
We have hung out 5 times and only had sex 3 of those times. I'd call that friendship
I woke up on a park bench with a nice homeless guy waking me up. I bought us Carl's Jr. Best birthday ever!
It was the scariest thing ever having a flame that close to my balls...
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