Me= Watching Ferngully. My neighbor= Having really loud sex including multiple orgasms
Oh God
I know, but the worst part is I'm not really sure which I'd rather be doing. Feel free to re-evaluate our friendship
I really think my ability to vom without making noise mmight be my most useful talent
I just saw a guy give a mop to his fat wife and say "Look, an exercise stick!"
Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
They said an hour before I even see a doctor...and they noticed the shots tally on my arm.
That dick who always called me a slut in high school showed up at the clinic with boner problems. Then I was assigned as his nurse. Who's laughing now. I AM.
winnie the pooh came out of nowhere and offered me a burrito...it was a fucking amazing burrito.
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
I just really need a hug and a shower beer
Well at least I still have a burrito in my pocket.
JUST BECAUSE I LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED DOESNT MEAN IM GOING TO LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED AT WORK
He climbed over 2 rows of the cab and told some random girl we were riding with that he would be in the back seat if she wanted to have sex
i got drunk and started dancing with the plant because you were out of town
To describe how high he was he said, " I'm cocked out of my ape sandwich" so yes...that was some pretty good weed.
Randomize