maybe you should take the dick out of your mouth before you start talking.
i did. i'm using it as a microphone.
Wish i knew that 10 minutes ago when i told him to dance with my blackberry while i got another drink
THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
i'm as serious about my hair as jesse from full house.
that is uncle jesse to you, show some respect.
I checked into jail on foursquare
He has a really nice penis but its like a model that wasn't built to scale
Annd you probably wouldn't of fallen down the stairs if you didn't insist on taking 'finale shots'
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
I totally just found ecstasy floating around in the bottom of my purse, it's almost like good karma from the time I lost that blow...but not quite
I remember telling you it was cold out because the sun was going to explode and people were going to fight for corn. I feel I've mislead you.
But for future reference, it might help your game if you don't tell the girl you're trying to get on your dick that she's "not the worst thing you've ever seen"
I have visions of guys in cheetah costumes with suits over it pissing on a children how are you
No, it's like a legit blood drive. It's not just her out in some parking lot with needles and ziplock bags
I don't know how to say "Sorry I was banging your boyfriend before I knew about you but you're awesome and we should hang out." without just saying it.
I was drunk, but not drunk enough to forget I had some dude on his knees begging for forgiveness.
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