The guy I fucked in the port a poty just called me and asked me on a date!
Awkward!
No he was cute and I said yes!
God is so good, I would give him a blow job right now.
It just feels so wrong throwing away the condoms into her Hello Kitty trashcan
you win again, gameday.
Just realized my talking to the tv hockey voice is same as my sex voice. Life just got a whole lot weirder.
there is potential here for me to have a consistent access to someone's dick who isn't actually an asshole. i think i'm ready for a relationship.
guy just got out of the car at the drive in and told his girlfriend "fuck you and your taco" and walked off
Hurricane my ass. I'm riding a god damn kayak down the flooded highway if it's the last god damn thing I do, god damnit.
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
I caved man... I fucked her so vigorously, desperately trying to correct her wonky eye. My determination was relentless.
You are a terrible person.
I just try to be optimistic...
That's the kind of activity you can only get away with by wearing a lion codpiece
Dick. I'll go round and break his windows. I've been watching Sons of Anarchy on Netflix.
yeah, but I wanna be the girl that makes him realize he's 100% gay
I don't think you could pull off being mean.
How do you think I'm still single?
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
Randomize
