oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
i'm writing my speech about my 4th grade backstreet boy concert experience. that sums up how seriously i take my life.
my underwear are soaked with white zifandel yet i have continued to wear them despite the fact im at home
At this point do you think buying mom a pot plant would be funny or highly inappropriate?
I scrubbed the bathroom, smoked a bowl, and gave myself 3 orgasms. If the world ends today, I feel accomplished.
I was mixing candy canes and coors light and was in a great place.
How was the rest of your night?
A little fuzzy and a lot naked.
it looks like my getting laid tonight is going to depend on my knowledge of native birds. this is a weird party
I'm stoned at 1030am, watching Maury with my exboyfriend. I need to make better choices with my life.
I just soaked a sugar cookie in nail polish remover to clean off my nails because I was too lazy to walk to the bathroom to get a cotton ball. Is this what rock bottom feels like?
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
There is a huge fucking spider in my bathroom....I can just burn our apartment down right? What do you need me to grab?
Why is there cereal literally EVERYWHERE?
It didn't follow directions.
It was great. We stayed up all night talking about objects he'd put in his theoretical vagina.
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