I wish they made sweatshirts for legs
you mean pants?
ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
His facebook says he is a fan of "underwater handjobs"
ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
i actually just woke up with a lampshade on my head. god damn cliches.
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
I went out in a blaze of glory. I failed the field sobriety test by saying ABCD FUCK YOU.
On another note, convinced a 9 year old my hickey was actually a zombie bite.
And I'm also limping. I just wish that I had self control. I'm 23 for fuck sake and I'm sitting at work, with mascara down my face, vomit on my clothes and an unknown black substance on my tits. How will I ever find my Greek husband if I keep this up?
in case you were wondering, even a BJ under a blanket on the back of a bus only lifts a 14-hour bus ride to borderline tolerable.
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
...I watched him run on the beach yesterday and I think I started ovulating
She's the prison bitch to my Martha Stewart.
Anything special planned for Valentines Day?
Does testing the strength of my coworker’s marriage count?
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