You really coming over, don't trick.
i am so fucked up that i think i'm playing snood in my head.
well..are you winning?
Did I tell you he has dinosaur sheets?
Sorry, I don't speak sober.
Once I saw his penis, I knew I made the right choice
He just showed up at my house and was like "have you seen an axe laying around?" he wasnt wearing any shoes.
how many thumbs am i supposed to have at one time
you found the shrooms didnt you
Would you get mad if I held a "how many dick pics can you get in one night" competition with my friend?
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
please tell me we weren't that bad as freshmen
i can't, we're worse now
We lost power at midnight which freaked out my roomate and friends. The power came back on 30 minutes later. We are now at the bar having "the rapture came and we were left behind" shots
how do you expect me to pass the time when I'm too old to be jailbait but too young to legally drink
His dad gives me dirty looks whenever I come over though. I think it's because I eat his food and have sex with his son.
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
You kept singing "your gonna lose that girl" to him right in front of her.. of course you got punched in the face.
Randomize