porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
Is my tampon string too long for this dress?
my sister just canceled her nose job because she thought it would hurt too much
It'll hurt less than being alone
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
just bailed mom out of jail. Tell me i'm not the favorite child
I'm about to tackle a 10 year old off a sea doo
All I know is I woke up next to her beside the toilet
Just think. Tomorrow you'll wake up, shower, and get your brains fucked out. That's your ice cream. Today is your peas and carrots.
My public calorie counter app is pretty much just a cry for help.
They usually take it with their boobs. It's like a horizontal motorboat
He bought segways. We ride them when we get drunk. Last night he ran through the sliding glass door.
Jk. Anyone who everbeers with me is my type.
You forgot your "boyfriend" from last night on my couch. You're suppose to bring that shit with you.
There's a girl passed out on the sidewalk at the parade. Its not even 10am. She gave candy to children saying it was ketchup. Still think I have a problem?
He just stopped in the middle of undressing for sex to dip his slice of pizza in ranch. I think I’m in love.
Randomize
