she thought Martin Luther king was a president at one time. I love knowing I broke up with my ex and this is what he ends up dating.
dude, never let a drunk girl playbite your dick. the doctor came in laughed and left.
I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
Just found a dugout in my rental car glove box. Suddenly my mood is upbeat.
right before he busted, he moaned the british are coming.
only on the fourth of july.
He asked if I smoke and I said "only fools like you on the basketball court!" Then I started crying. I think I'm about to have my period.
Its a little weird going to a wedding where I've screwed the bride and my wife has screwed the groom. Great wedding though.
got one for peeing in public....called the cop a donut dunking communist...should be a fun court appearance
I'm putting you on my Emergency card so i can spend the last ounce of strength in my hospital bed to flip you off.
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
well it was great until i saw his anime body pillow
I think someone is dead in a car across the street
Scratch that, dude's getting a blow job
My fart just smelled like the inside of white castle, I mean spot on, no difference whatsoever.
Plan before tomorrows interview: wash off green glitter from EVERYWHERE!!!
Nothing wrong with a little cat scratch fever. You have toys?
A few, plus a dildo molded from a porn star that I've always been too intimidated of to actually use, but it's the apocalypse, and momma didn't raise no quitter.
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