okay serious question, the water is shut off in your house, do you attempt and use the clean toilet water for your new bong?
Just met a female bro. Things are weird at the rugby party.
The foreigner finally woke up and the first thing he did was look up a map of the u.s. His destination is to pennsylvania.
Bitch, I been tryna reach you all day to talk to you about these Dorito tacos.
ALso, saw an adorable man walking an adorable dog with his adorable kid.
And yes, that last sentence is biased because my ovaries started screaming
I'm high. Everything has a 45° angle. That is as far as my eyes open
Im invoking the "no judgements" clause of our friendship.
My god, what have you done?
My vagina was just really confused why you weren't inside it
Why did you fed-x me a peanut butter sandwich?
It seemed like the thing to do. There's popcorn on it too.
STOP smoking sooo much weed. Damn
i refuse to give everyone the satisfaction of seeing the results of my acting on my thoughts
All I know is I was bleeding, she was bleeding, we stole someone's Lucky Charms, and then I made you guys order a pizza
You were dancing to the Bee Gees, at 3am, with a piece of ham on your head. Moral of the story, You can't drink.
My vagina just clenched in fear
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
Come by so you can take a pregnancy test with me. It's like my monthly ritual!
Randomize
