Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
Last night I apparently send my boss a picutre of my boobs. On the bonus part I got a raise today. So I just want to thank your parents for naming you Jeff cuz if I was not so hammered last night I would have sent it to the right one.
It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
Is it wrong of me that I wish I could be a midget for a day so I can give head standing up?
Im sending over a girl who thinks youre in the next twilight movie
your the best winggirl ever
Ok...drunk girls at the bar are charging $1 for motorboating. It's fucking WEDNESDAY. I never want to leave.
As long as there aren't any pictures of me humping the penguin, we are good,
Her parents walked in on us. So for my birthday they bought me a blow-up doll with their daughters face on it. I don't know what to think right now.
This dude has my number from April last year. Drunk me left sober me a puzzle. No confirmation of pants off business
Dude, he threw a pool chair off of an 8 story building. It was a successful night I'd say.
I'm honestly considering asking her if I can eat her out, as a friend.
So I have to masturbate in a hospital. I wonder what kind of porn they have.
We dated for a month and a half. he didn't like blow jobs. I honestly don't think he was human.
Omg. I definitely just got hit on by my doctor AFTER he completed my pap smear which clearly showed I was in the middle of an outbreak. What. The. Fuck.
Randomize
