And I just remember seeing him for the first time and being like, who is this ape of a man? Like legit he could be the missing link
Dude im not sure whos apartment i woke up in but i just showered here and their shampoo in phenomenal
you yelled then hung up at the girl on information bc she could not pinpoint your location and tell you how to get to dennys
Y'know, without the cops, it would've just been us daydrinking,
im in class. still drunk. wearing one sock. eating a breakfast sandwich and trying to make sure this bottle of whiskey doesnt fall out of my purse in front of my professor
i just spent 10 minutes talking to the lady who works at taco bell about my romantic situation.
Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe.
I was informed that last night we held hands while puking on the curb outside the bar.
We just have a real special relationship.
I just remember being in the bathroom alone cussing out the bunny
No one parties "Full Karen". She once broke a couple up at the bar, ate the girl out in the bathroom and took the guy home.
I have an interview tomorrow! The couple we regularly swing with said I could use them as references. Winning
"We drove to the deserted part of the parking lot, and that's where we blew each other. It was so romantic."
just called AAA to get my keys out of me car and then afterwards realized they were in my pocket...stoner life
Now just crop his dad out and add it to the spank bank.
No I don't. You owe me sex and cinnamon rolls.
Randomize
