Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
meet me or not, i'm out of control
So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
pretty sure i saw you masturbating on chatroulette a minute ago. yes, i can recognize your cock
I THOUGHT I SAW YOU
you made me have a moment of silence for the half of a sub sandwich that you dropped on the floor earlier
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
ok. can u leave the new roommate a list of instructions for me? like what i need to be fed and when i need to be exercised?
Corn dogs constantly. And all.the time
Let us do this. Tomorrow night is thirsty Thursday. Let us drink whiskey from the bottle and have men in plastic gloves inscribe permanent images of each others faces onto our buttocks.
You were sitting in the middle of the floor spewing vodka at people proclaiming "I a whale". That drunk.
My goal is to go an entire semester without cocaine. That's an adult goal right?
I think I'll handle my grief by throwing myself headlong into lesbianism. Seems like a fitting tribute to you.
Would it be crossing a line if I told him that I now know his girlfriend has a huge mole on her left ass cheek?
Accomplishment of the day: changing my tampon at 38,000 ft with turbulence. Fasten seatbelt sign was definitely on.
Having sex with him is like yoga. I do it in the morning and then can't walk for three days afterwards.
Never go to your parents' super bowl party. I learned, in great detail, "Why Aunt Trisha is a hoe" Not enough beer on the eastern seaboard.
Randomize
