just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
i kept telling her phones are not food, and she countinued to put it in her mouth..
thank you TLC waking up to a water birth on tv really put the cherry on top of my hangover...
I AM SAFE. EVERYTHING IS FOG. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED.
Bachelor party turned 19 hour search and rescue in the mountains. nbd
Drunk on Tuesday. Double fisting. Mmmbop is playing. Only girl in the group. Life is complete.
Annnnd I didn't even notice there is a guy dancing in a jock strap beside me. That explains girls smiling at me
Dude, we apparently put a washing machine drum in that back of your truck with the full intention of making a bonfire in it.
Well I took a spicy wing shit in a field this morning.
He is more interested in finding his sweater than he is in having sex with me. It better be a great fucking sweater.
Did you leave a mouse under my pillow again?
I will pepper spray him so fast I don't even care
For someone who claims to be straight, she knows a hell of a lot about bi erasure, and one Hayley Kiyoko song too many
I went looking for them and I pulled my pants down and peed on the lawn. I found my phone in the same spot in the morning.
she keeps trying to brush her hair with leaves and insisting she's not high
Randomize
