It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
the trash is collected at 5:50 on mondays. i was up puking all night and heard them
unlike you, ive never imagined darth vader masturbating
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
pre-gaming in the library. just gonna keep going until i'm too drunk to keep working and then i'll be there.
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
Aaaaand then she sang MDMA to the tune of the YMCA song, with appropriate gestures.
He got completely naked and is now just standee there next to my bed poking at my hamster. Why can't I get sex the normal way.
I'm watching intervention which is getting me psyched for your birthday. Is that wrong?
You invited the cop in for a "Celebrity shot"
This is a mass text to all my friends. Whoever gets this first, please find me and confiscate my phone immediately. I am far too high to have it. Even if you have to punch me in my face to get it. Otherwise, let the "High While Analyzing Disney Movies" texts begin.
What! You have to go to class. Otherwise, you're wasting money that could have been spent on weed. Gotta get that shit in perspective.
yeah, i thought because of the nature of his job he would have been better at it, but i guess there's a difference between a bagpipe and vagina
Hi I am on my way. I stopped and got the cheeseburger you asked for. Are you gonna pay me back?
Who is this?
Randomize
