So this girl in my math class just went to the bathroom, tampon in hand, comes back with it still in her hand starts digging around in her purse, takes her thing of birthcontrol out, goes oh fuck, and downs the rest of the pills. Got to love college.
terrible decisions. terrible terrible terrible decisions.
who'd you have sex with.
If I wanted to fuck someone, I'd go for John. I'm meeting Bryan cuz I wanna get to know him better. And eventually fuck him. But not this Tuesday.
Last night you were talking while puking saying, "ahh the shoes and the purse, I'm gonna have to wash those"
Thanks for pulling me out of the bed by my feet atleast one of us was sober enough to know I had work at 5 am.
Man in California was arrested for killing and eating a wild bobcat while high on crystal meth. Let's please NEVER get that high on anything...
I woke up naked wrapped in my roommate's towel with one leg shaved and money thrown all over the room. Happy 21st birthday.
Me and allie were just offered cocaine by a strange man in a women's bathroom. Why have I not lived in Austin my whole life?
When you sober up and come in here, I'm in your bed because you pissed on me in mine. So fuck. Off.
Because its Monday... And I'm determined to just be drunk for the rest of the semester
I think after 8 tries we can say Stoli Thursdays cause too much damage.
i love it when bitches who pick on you in high school get fat. thank you facebook you have made my day.
I think he's trying to finish jacking off before throwing up again
Btw. I have a sinus infection from doing cocaine in a portapotty at a Duran Duran concert. So, gimme a couple of days before y'all start the party.
Drunk me bought a cell phone last week and began texting sober me. The conversation between the two is still on going.
Randomize
