Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
recess is on disney at 4 in the morning, insomnia has never been so rewarding
We tried having a conversation with our noses.
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
I'm sad your dog died... Her name is my stripper name.
Just think of all the blizzard sex people are having right now
I swear there's a gravitational pull from your vagina to large groups of men in uniform.
why are all my papers due the day after my potential hangover
he said he'd buy me TWO burritos if I took my shirt off
Now I can't unsee my hot boss's under-boobs. Monday will be awkward.
Pics or STFU
oh my god you are days, if not hours away from a dick pic. This is the day the lord has made rejoice and be glad in it
I want to conceive our bastard child on an athletic field. Why can't we make this happen?
well we woke up in different beds than the ones we originally fell asleep in, you were butt naked, and your boyfriend was sleeping on a cot in the middle of the kitchen. that might be why he's mad.
Randomize
