you keep denying me to hang out, should i take a hint?
you keep asking me after midnight, should i take a hint?
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
I was just "that girl you seen blowing some dude outside when you drove by"
You could probably play six degrees of separation of my cock in this city.
Dude shes not that fat. Plus, last night I probably would've done it too.
It's 10AM, she's drunk blaring veggie tales and I have a paper to write you've got to be fucking kidding me
Russians do not operate on the same level as the rest of us. hoping I wake up tomorrow
I hate it when the guy who runs the chicken and waffles truck is convinced that I run a cult.
that is the opposite of a normal text message.
It is very possible that having sex with you just now just got me into Yale
guy next to me on the train just pulled out two bottles of gin and a block of cheddar. is slowly making his way through all of them.
okay we need to get tested.
no YOU need to get tested. I'm just going along for the ride.
She gave me a roadie as we drove home from fireworks. People were still lighting off their displays as we drove by. I love America.
For a guy who came before his dick was out of his pants, he gave surprisingly good head.
Twas still the Saturday before Christmas \nAnd it’s still fucking snowing\nAnd Steve wished he slowed down \nOn all the fucking drinking
I woke up upside down with my head in your ottoman and like a foot of space between the ottoman and chair.. My legs were straight up in the air... Yes. Your mother found me.
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