IM NOT LETTING YOU PEE ON ME IF THATS WHAT YOURE GETTING AT.
I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
we've been dating more than a month and i just realized there's no hair on his chest..
you've had sex with him. you must've seen him naked.
nah, i feel like naked sex would be getting too serious for us..
I want a meaningful relationship and i wont get one if i keep giving him blow jobs in my basement while watching family guy.
My afternoon will now be spent googling genital warts. I think my life is over.
I don't know ur idea of a good first date but I'm pretty sure it shouldn't include him holding my hair while I puke in the street
Leaving the phone at home last night was the best decision I ever made.... Though I still managed to text her and now I have 2 phones...
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
Getting up is taking longer than anticipated. Alcoholic fish bowls have made getting out of bed a multitstep process.
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
I banged a guy named Robbie last night and in the middle of sex he begged me to scream santos. I'm pretty sure I just screwed a dude with multiple personalities.
We got stoned and took selfies with the most perfect lawn
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