ignore voicemail. the cock hath been unblocked.
He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
There's a fat drunk walrus bitch here next to me and shes already puked and now falling on herself
OH FUCK NOW HER BOYFRIEND IS MAKING OUT WITH HER VOMIT HOLE
Sounds like a good blink 182 concert...
Mike is offhisass drunk and just sat down next to my sister and said "If you gained 30 pounds and stopped reading poetry, I would be attracted to you. Now, your little sister, attractive, even though she's basically the same person as you- she just pulls it off better because she's 15."
do you know how hard it is to pee with a pumpkin in the toilet ?
Nothing kills the mood when I am hooking up on the dance floor like the DJ saying Happy Valentines.
There's always time for handjobs
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
i was debating whether to load antoher bowl when i realized i was holding a sandwich in one hand and a cookie in the other. and laughing.
So apparently I threw a potted plant at a clown last night and told him to get his life together.
tom claimed she had a star tattooed around her buttonhole. i am not prepared for this era of skankyness
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
And thanks! There are perks to polyamory. And birthday orgies are one of them
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
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