he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
Just gave my manager part of my viccodin stash-my job is basically secured forever.
So can you tell me who's underwear is on the cat?
i came on her dog
I think she just stepped in a piece of mac and cheese, picked it off the bottom of her foot and ate it.
Oh just living the dream. And by living the dream I mean drinking franzia out of a martini glass and watching family matters. Also, drinking every time Carl Winslow has a mustache and Eddie wears MC Hammer pants
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
Can you bring me a corn dog or something shaped like one?
He called us the '3 Amigos' and told us if hos ex wife came we had to jump the porch railing and hide in the bushes.
Yo, I totally had forgotten you were CA. Thank you for making my life easier with modern medicine.
You haven't demanded nudes today. You alright?
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
Just discovered I was so fucked up last night I called in sick to work... TWICE
Randomize