im giving 12 year olds life advice. this is probably illegal somewhere.
And then like 10 minutes later they were taking a bath together. HOW DOES HE DO IT.
You disinfected one of his friends, buttered the jeans of the other one. And you poured every liquid you could reach on the floor, including cooking oil and green tea. It wasnt a great first impression
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
??I have an official piece of documentation saying you are banned from Las Vegas.
ive cried into many a lonely burritos..
I know you're my sister, but I'm pretty sure I'm going to have sex with one of your exes this weekend. He's probably not gay, but I'll let you know.
I was thinking that maybe I should not apply to Wells Fargo because they def have me on candid camera taking a drunken nap at 3am in their lobby.
He literally took a shit in my bathroom and then broke up with me.
In two separate occurrences, I could have avoided getting my heart broken, and chlamydia, all with a left swipe.
How hard do you think it would be to make a drinking game out of a Slip-N-Slide? Asking for a friend.
Honestly it was like 3 AM and I only agreed to go to the strip club because I wanted chicken tenders
So, I found your eyebrow, someone glued it in between my eyebrows so I looked like I had a unibrow when I went to work...
We were totally high while having sex, I told him fast or slow, just follow your balls. That was a show stopper.
Dude. I just got a visual of u climbing over a bathroom stall to save my life.
Randomize
