Full bush! Can't stay! Need ride! Come on bro!
all thats left of you is your magnum wrapper on my dresser
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
Just watched the couple I sit for and 4 of their friends shotgun beers like college kids. Please let this be us when we get older.
Come help me clean. I know we won't be getting our security deposit back...but I would like to move out with our dignity.
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
You kept running up to random groups of people and saying "I'm a Dallas Cowboy Cheerleader so we all have to chug our drinks!" and they all listened to you.
but im not going to tell the owner of the penis of my dreams how to wear his hair.
It would be like if I said I had the cure for cancer and my explanation was I like turtles.
Opted for cash back rather than the 10% extra I'd get for store credit, solely for drinks tonight.
You're lovely.
When in doubt, it's too much cheese
You kept whispering to me that the guy making your burrito was an angel.
Woke up this morning with girl, I ask her for some gum. She says "there's a guest toothbrush for the boys in my bathroom". I can't decide whats worse, that she has a shack brush or that I actually used it
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
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