I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
There's nothing more uncomfortable than drifting into sexual fantasies on a roadtrip and realizing you have a boner with three other dudes in the car.
You tipped the bathroom lady $20 and then yelled "IT'S YOUR LUCKY DAAAAAAAY" at her.
i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
Apparently I was trying to convince him Springsteen has had buttsex. I ended the argument with "I bet he came from it too."
MISSING: One left eyebrow. Reward if returned.
You can't just send the picture of my vagina back to me, 2 months after we broke up, and make small talk out of it.
Dude, just look at these fucking curtains and chill out.
My weekend will be all about the double d's, desert & debauchery
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
I'm crying and shaving my Bronco playoff beard
Dude, you got arrested for trying to direct traffic with your dick....
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
I'm not saying I'm planning to hook up tomorrow but I'm also not saying I'm unprepared for it
When you realized the door was unlocked, you did the mission impossible yheme song and snuck into the bathroom. And continued it while you peed.
Randomize
