I want to stick my p in your. b.
can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
she hid the dish soap because she was afraid someone would confuse it with the margaritas and drink it instead. her reasoning was "theyre both soo pink...i cant tell them apart"
I'm so hungover that if we go to panera, I'll probably get a bread bowl to throw up in.
No, I don't just love you because you have big boobs. I just wouldn't visit as often.
Promise me you won't have sex in my room
I can't promise you that, but I promise you that I'll try
Might want to in your tub tho. That thing is fucking huge.
that's just what you get for learning massage techniques from gay porn
I think that means you're growing up...when your coke nail becomes your opening mail nail.
Well since your going through her phone..look man she loves you..she just loves my dick more
She seriously left me for a guy that likes his own statuses on facebook.....
I told her I was going to masterbate myself into a coma... We have another date on Thursday.
You "drove" the computer chair around the party for a good fifteen minutes. you would crash into things, freak out, and yell for an ambulance.
5 seconds ago I had no idea that a fart could travel so fastly thru the tanning bed. I taste it in the back of my neck.
We told the cop that we were playing soccer, in flip flops, and 2:30 in the morning. It was raining and i had board shorts on. He bought it, lets go get drunk
Are we allowed to ho on the roof?
Randomize
