I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
i never thought i'd have to say "please stop having sex on me"
wow.
yeah, it was that bad.
I had a dream once that juice was flowing out of my kitchen faucet
just fed a duck at the lake a weed brownie. it hasnt moved in 20 minutes.
Last night I dreamed I was having gay sex in prison. That's the last time we go to theme night at the club.
Trying to convince my mother to let me take some of my sisters Lortab to sell is not going well
For some reason i am carrying prostate cancer brochures. i am nor used to drinking this early.
You did a strip tease for the toilet.
This honesty session brought to you by jagermeister inc.
just walked past the recycling bin in class, there's keystone cans in it. go cougs.
captain&coke to the library. STAT. this is an emergency. this is not a drill. I repeat: THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
My mom ate salad out of the vodka bowl
Im organizing a group to help fondle my shoe. Too many shots dude. Too many.
Beard. Chest hair. Job.
The holy trinity.
Dude, exfoliate your balls. you'll thank me later.
Randomize
