did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
What can i say im a girl who smells like weiners.
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
Just tried on my bathing suit for the first time this year. Had to drink a beer to numb the pain.
Upside of a two-day migraine: thanks to a prominent "E" in the middle of every pill, I think we can totally pass off Excedrine Migraine as ecstasy to stupid, drunk freshman. This is totally going to happen. That entrepreneurship course is paying off.
Please tell me why 'cock-a-thon' was auto saved in my phone.
Apologies for hacking your facebook and posting that picture of you passed out hooked up to the IV...but we were sat with you on the ER floor for 3 hours, it got boring
Drunkkker than when I told the drag queen she was prettier than me
I don't see what kind of idea someone could get from an envelope covered in jesus stickers and a note from a person and their dog. I'd say crazy person alert before flirting.
Dear America, sometimes I miss your Everclear and its consequences.
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
Bonding with my year old cousin over the fact that we both shit ourselves. Babysitting like a bosss
Sometimes I feel like I should become a beautician purely for my ability to shave pretty shapes into my pubic hair.
Only thing I have going for me is jacking off, weed, and saturdays
I just discovered that jello shots are the best hangover cure
You said that last night when you did jello shots at 4am
Randomize
