what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
i found a beer bottle on top of the urinal, peed in it and put it back... if anyone gets drunk enough to fall for it they deserve it
He was so bad, he was dry humping me and his dick was nowhere close to my vagina.
I think the fact that my first kiss is now in a porno says a lot about why my life is the way it is
you said you couldnt let go of the fence because your hand was molding to it.
There are bud lights poping out of the zipper of my overnight bag and my dildo almost fell out in the elevator. not professional
THAT DOESN'T MEAN YOU SHOULD LET ME CHUG VODKA.
It's "your husband had his mouth on my vagina" awkward.
It's Been clinically proven that people who have sex 6 or more times per week are happier than those who don't. Just and FYI. For your mental health. From a soon so be psychologist. Who is drunk.
I woke up this morning with a tampon in my nose and food EVERYWHERE...
That was awkward , having sex with her while her husband watched via Skype. I'm a porn star or a target. Idk
I'm far too poor to be letting my hookups wear my shirts home. I'm down to about a total of 8 shirts and have no intention of buying more
The last time the Patriots won the Super Bowl I lost my virginity. I can only imagine what'll happen if they win this year.
I thought the first time I got peed on it would be by a baby...
Dude my cat is eating sugar cookies with me. No joke. My cat likes cookies.
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