A joint and a Nerds Rope = breakfast of champions for the unemployed
you're like a bully in the Christmas story
Nailed a drunk college girl before the CU game Saturday, and a drunk married woman after the Broncos game Sunday.
Some perfection is debatable.
So he thinks I sent him a picture of my boob last night, but it was really just a close up of my arm.
Telling me that I would make a great "occasional fuck" was not appreciated.
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
I believe I convinced two girls to makeout for freedom last night Hahaha
Let's be honest, your relationships fail because the man you're looking for is the equivalent of an intellectual blow-up doll.
You just stood up, raised your glass and said, "I'd like to thank the academy" then fell through a glass table. THAT'S why we cut you off.
Just woke up from a dream where I had lesbian sex with myself (a clone of me)... Take that, Freud!
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
There. Isnt. A. Single. Person. Who. Is. Not. High. At. Church.
Statistics show that guys with slightly higher IQ scores and overly-trimmed eyebrows have micro penises. It's science.
I decided taking Molly and seeing Birdman seemed like a wise life choice.
She ripped her shorts off and yelled "VAGINA TIME!"
Randomize
