Found out in my property law class that you can sell your eggs for $8000. Helloooo spring break.
Superbowl + Mdma, hope we're on the same page.
just got hammed at grandma and grampas 30th aniversary bash .. from the looks i was getting im guessing i wont be seeing an inheritance ...
I feel like after that many guys, all of the water in your body is just replaced with pure jizz, honestly.
Nobody is here, I still yelled for someone to make me some toast. That my dear is commitment to doing nothing.
I'm having flashbacks from last night. Did I admit to pausing Whitney's funeral because I was watching porn? I believe I did.
I guess the study abroad went badly, I gave him a joint and he just smoked it and cried all the way from the airport
I fcuked ip.
Is this your way of telling me that you got drunk in your office before meeting with your dissertation advisor again? Or that you finally banged that freshman fraternity pledge?
Please, take the 2 shots of vodka that I left as an apologie.
Someone had Captain Morgan and orange juice at the same moment I lost my hangover and I just had to give it a try.
Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?
He said the pain stops when I get my shit together and stop being a drugged out alcoholic mess. Could have just said no.
Naked. naked and bneed help.
Please tell me I made it home with both shoes on
Nope
I'm not totally useless... You can use me as an example of what not to do
Randomize
