Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
My lawyer watched my DUI video. Said of the thousand or so he's seen, mine was one of the top ten best.
i just broke my key off in the door of my house because the engine wasnt starting
just masturbated through my pocket at the library. hope you're enjoying your saturday night out.
airport. 106 proof japanese liquor. 4 little travel size containers. im proud to be smarter than the average american.
Being back home for the summer opens up so many opportunities to have sex without increasing my number
Accidentally just signed something at work 'lotus flower' I need to keep my stripper life separate from real life.
Hey I think I found part of your tooth next to your wine bottle in the floor board of my car.
Got hereat 8. Had 6 beers 2 shots and a game of diZZY BATOS
I just feel like a girl who's never eaten a pb&j probably doesn't swallow
I think this bruise on my arm is actually an impression of your face
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
I don't remember his name. I had whataburger on my mind and in my hands so I wasnt really listening
Instead of asking him how many women he's slept with I just got straight to the point and asked how many Plan B pills he's purchased
Randomize
